We all have the capacity to change and become the person we want to be. Improving our self is a worthy goal and certainly required if we are to pursue the life we have always wanted.
As challenging as personal growth can be, the people in our lives can represent an unexpected hurdle. Our family, friends and co-workers complicate our ability to change. They see us so clearly as we were, they can’t see us as we could be. They will not let us change. They subconsciously label us based on our past results and are unable or unwilling to see our effort to grow. Their preconceived idea of who and what we were is so ingrained that it represents another challenge as we strive for personal growth.
This can be frustrating and we may begin to feel “I am damned if I do and damned if I don’t” as we work on ourselves. Our efforts and results aren’t recognized or acknowledged. And, quite often our efforts are sabotaged.
If we are known for being insensitive or argumentative and we are deliberately cooperative and empathetic 100 days in a row, but blow it on the 101st day, guess what is acknowledged? That we are insensitive and argumentative.
If we are known for laziness, but are industrious for several months in a row and choose to take a break one afternoon, we are perceived as “always” lazy. There are many examples we could use, but the point has been made.
Wouldn’t you agree that it is tough for others to see us in a new light even when the evidence is right before their eyes? Given that most of us have experienced being labeled to one degree or another, wouldn’t it be a good idea if we made sure we aren’t doing the same thing to others?
We need to give ourselves permission to grow and change as well as do the same for others.